Conservapedia
Conservapedia is a wiki that contains biased Conservative views. It was created with the sole purpose of turning people into apes. Of course it’s a a huge plan to brainwash mankind and make them think the earth is flat, it could only be thought as an ill-conceived ultra-orthodox Christian site started by a couple of old church ladies in apparent response to an imagined liberal bias on the part of wikipedia(The truth is that, to far-right conservatives, it is reality that has a left wing bias - not Wikipedia, which is actually conservatively biased.). Conservapedia asserts misinformed opinion as fact. They equate homosexuality with polygamy and liberals with terrorists. A logical response to Conservapedia would sound something like this: "All hail the hypno-toad. Al Gore will lead the liberal nation to glorious empire upon the moon." It is a fundamentalist Christian wiki encyclopedia project which promotes Biblical creation science and rejects non-scientific evolutionary dogma. Heavily criticized liberals with nothing better to do, it is the subject of ridicule from those who are used to getting information without a heavy dose of fundamentalist hilarity. Its most heavily-viewed pages are about such topics as homosexuality, Wikipedia, and Adolf Hitler. The site became more famous than it ever deserved to be when progressives discovered it and trolled it. At that point it had been mainly written by educated home-schooled creationist children, making it better then this trashheap. Progressives began vandalizing it and linking to it from blogs urging people to vandalise or debate with them. This almost certainly accounted for better than two thirds of the hits Conservapedia got at that point. Later some atheist morons began to try to inject evolutionary dogma into the site - but soon ran afoul of Conservapedia's blocking policy(insert leftist bull=a block). Evolution became a battle-ground and later doughnuts. But the atheists could not hold the line, and were exiled in what became known as the "Night of the Blunt Knives". Some entered on the long trek to RationalWiki where they first plotted to troll Conservapedia. But later they forgot their proletariat roots and became another bourgeois wiki concerned about its own hit count. Others founded the Almighty Liberapedia wiki you are reading now, and which is one of the sources of truth and fact on the internet. Meanwhile, CP continues on its own path of biblical literalism and republicanism, making it a source of "truth." Blocking Policy On Conservapedia, you can be blocked for... :...using the wrong sort of English. :...questioning the opinions of the admins. Some of them are so stupid they can't answer questions. :...making a username which an admin disagrees with. (anything that doesn't praise Ronald Reagan, George W. Bush, God or Jesus) :...using discussion to as a means of improving Conservapedia. :...being an god hater :...having a friend who is not Christian :...using birth control or condoms. :...admitting that FOX News isn't Fair and Balanced. :...comprehending the lie that the American government was wrong about Iraq. :...comprehending the idea that the French are not complete idiots, they are only semi-idiots :...saying that the UK was a strong nation during WWII, and that America wasn't the best of them all. :...saying that Christianity, a religion that says you should not kill as opposed to you should kill, is wrong and you should kill people for fun because there is no god. Note: If you question Andy, then he will brand you as a liberal. While perfectly sane people know that isn't bad at all, as a matter of fact it's a very good thing, Andy will block you for it. What to do if they block you *Join Liberapedia *Join Rational Wiki Conservapedia says: All of these need citations! # All kangaroos are descended from a single pair who were on Noah's Ark. # Gravity is an unproven theory. # Einstein's General Relativity "has nothing to do with physics". # Only followers of Christianity are capable of religious faith. # Atheists are incapable of being moral. # Jews are "touchy" about the Holocaust. # Some of the most violent homicides seen by pathologists are among male homosexuals. # The Beach Boys are an example of heavy metal. # There were dinosaurs on Noah's Ark. # The Earth might be the center of the universe # Rock music causes riots.http://www.conservapedia.com/Music # McCarthyism was good. # Ann Coulter is hot and spicy. # Belief in the Theory of Relativity leads to a belief in moral relativity (a bad thing). # Dinosaurs are "generally believed" to be extinct. # "God exercises eternal and righteous judgment of the wicked in hell." # Homosexuality can cause bad smoking habits. Suggested Course of Action ;Don't Go To Conservapedia Any More. Except for 3 things: # Comedic relief. But even then, on any given page there is a 30% chance of headdesk from loss of faith in humanity. # To support the Liberal Revolution against Conservapedia! If you want to join in, simply make an account. It should NOT contain the word Liberal or anything that is liberal-y, instead place words that inspire "warm fuzzies" in Conservatives, such as JesusLover4evr or ReaganResurrected. Or choose something simple that won’t attract attention. That way, they won't suspect a thing, and they will be stunned when you start to VANDALIZE!! Those old church ladies will never defeat the amazing powers of mass spam, and perhaps break a hip when trying to fix it! # You might be a diabolical reader who knows how to internet-method-act. If so, they make a perfectly innocuous username on CP, make perfectly innocuous mainspace edits, and don't put anything inflamatory on your userpage. Then IMITATE ANDY and use such methods as the Schlafly Reversal and the Schlafly Liberalator and protect the "truth" in key debates. Don't EVER question Andy. Do this for a year or so, adding content and bashing "liberals" using "logic," and perhaps Andy will make you a sysop. When he promotes you, be sure to thank Andy profusely, then send our warm fuzzy notices to the other admins. Wait one to two days doing perfectly normal CP sysop-type things, such as making full use of the Schlafly Rearguard, then--GO INSANE! PROTECT EVERYTHING! BLOCK EVERYONE! SPAM THE ADMINS! It'll be the ultimate vengeance! You'll be welcomed into Liberapedia with fanfare. RationalWiki will celebrate you as a hero. Start right away! But don't do anything malicious, or you might just get "refered to the authorities." DON'T EVER MENTION THE FBI INCIDENT. Racism and sexism Conservapedia's article on presidential candidate Barack Obama page also refuses to acknowledge that he would be the first African American president, referring to him instead to (should he be elected) the first " Affirmative Action" President. It is said that a Affirmative Action President is one who is only elected because of his or her race or sex, so that when an African-American or female President is elected, the site can blame it on Affirmative Action, stating that is the only reason for the candidate's success. Young Earth Creationist View on Conservapedia Young Earth Creationists believe Conservapedia is run by a coterie of ultra-liberal conservationists determined to drive conservatives away from religion with an editorial policy that insures every article on the site makes out that all Christians are irrational airheads. The YEC community also believes that the liberal deceit in every article on the site is designed to persuade conservatives that homeschooling inevitably produces illiterate fanatics. Prominent spokespeople for the YEC and Homeschooling movement have pointed to passages in Revelations that predict an evil twin will be created as a mirror image of The One True Wikipedia for the purpose of leading the faithful astray and into the clutches of the Evil One. See also *Conservapedia Sysops *Conservatipedia Parody Web site *Ku Klux Klan *NAMBLA *Ridiculous quotes from Conservapedia *Why Conservapedia Sucks External links *Conservapedia (Hilarious Uncyclopedia article) Category:Conservapedia category:Stupidity Category:Child Abuse